Parents often try to think about what their children need most after a divorce. Do they need less focus on rules and more fun time? Do they need more time with friends? Should they get them some of the things they have been clambering for, like the newest gaming system?
The idea behind these thoughts is simple: Divorce is hard. It’s stressful. Parents just want to know what they can do to reduce that stress and make life go smoothly for their children.
If that’s your focus, forget about buying them the newest things or giving in to their every desire. They really just need two main things: support and routine.
Support shows them that they’re not alone. They know that both of their parents still love them. They get help with the things they struggle with, they can talk about their emotions and they get answers to their questions. They may still feel confused or concerned, but they know they have loving parents who will assist them. That’s calming.
Routine shows them that this doesn’t have to create a drastically different life. They can still read books before bed. They can still go to school just like they have for years. They can still have fun family game nights or participate in sports. All of the other things that are important to them in life do not have to change, and they can still be happy and even thrive.
If you are a parent who wants to focus on your child’s well-being, keep these things in mind. Then consider what steps you need to take to create a child custody plan that delivers.
